#1. Words lie, bodies don’t.

The truth leaks out of our bodies like a pockmarked water pail. As soon as we put a finger in one hole another one opens up. You may think you look calm, cool and collected, but look down– your foot’s tapping the floor like a woodpecker. Sexual signals bounce all over the place whenever gay men get together, and they’re being sent with heads, eyes, arms, hands, legs, and feet. Yes, feet. Long story, keep reading.

#2. Your body language changes when you see somebody hot. And you’re usually not aware of it.

Hidden camera studies show that a man’s posture changes when he sees somebody that turns him on. He, or more to the point, YOU, will:

1. Pull your stomach. (To look sleeker)
2. Throw your shoulders back (to occupy more space)
3. Puff up your chest (to look bigger)
4. Lift your head (To look taller)
5. Protrude your jaw (to look more dominant)

It’s a form of preening. Researchers call it “Auto-erotic signaling.”

#3. Body language doesn’t just reflect your inner emotions. It creates them.

Keeping your body language “open” isn’t just critical to changing other people’s moods and attitudes; it’s critical to changing yours. This concept doesn’t just apply to your hands or your palms; it applies to everything. The more you “fake” open and inviting gestures and expressions, the more genuinely open and inviting you’ll become.

Don’t take my word for it; test it. Cross your arms against your chest. What do you notice? After a few minutes, you’ll get quieter, more introspective and less likely to smile or laugh. It’s the body’s built-in feedback loop-’bad mood’ body positions result in bad moods, period. It works the other way around, too. Uncross your arms and keep your palms open for a couple of minutes. Hmm. Is that your spirit lifting or are you just happy to see me? If you want to attract gay men, heed this principle.

#4. The best way to meet and attract gay guys is to use open and inviting gestures.

Keeping your body open and inviting is so important to attracting guys that almost nothing else matters. If you cross your arms, for example, you might as well spray man-repellant on yourself. This goes for any gesture or movement that forms a barrier-holding your hands together, crossing your legs, closing your knees, slouching, or holding anything that blocks your chest, heart and stomach.

#5 Our bodies point toward men we like and away from men we don’t.

Does he like you? Look down. Men subconsciously point with their feet. It’s our way of saying, “Hubba Hubba.” Once, I was in a coffeehouse macking on a hottie who was ignoring his friend. He turned his body toward me, made lots of eye contact, and directed most of the conversation to me. Yet, for all those positive signs, I wasn’t feeling the vibe. My napkin fell to the floor and as I bent down to pick it up, I cursed under my breath. His feet were pointed to his friend! Sure enough, I saw them on a date a few days later. Guilty feet have got no rhythm but they never lie.

Putting it Together. If you want to meet gay men, pay attention to these five core principles of gay male body language. Whether you’re the pursuer or the pursued, the same principles apply: Your body language changes when you see a guy you’re attracted to (so be aware of it), you can consciously use certain body language tactics to change your mood, use open and inviting gestures and finally, if you want to know if a gay guy is attracted to you, watch where he points (especially his feet).

Mike Alvear writes a sex advice column syndicated to the gay press. His instantly downloadable ebook on gay body language, ATTRACT HOTTER GUYS, is available at http://www.mikealvear.com/ebook.

If you’re skeptical about how the subtlest body language affects your love life, play a game with me.

Straighten your arm as if you were doing a “Heil Hitler” salute. What’s the feeling? Dominant, aggressive, hateful, right? It isn’t your arm that’s creating those feelings, by the way. It’s your palm.

Watch.

Keep your arm in the air, but now turn the palm up. What’s the feeling now? Open, inviting, fun. Turn the palm down and you feel like Hitler. Turn it up and you feel like…

Evita!

Now, if a simple palm movement has that kind of emotional impact on you, imagine the effect it has on other people.

Clearly we don’t go around saluting like SS guards, but you’d be surprised at how every day palm gestures can have nearly the same negative effects. Quick example: I have a good friend who’s fairly disliked by a good many people. Although I think he’s kind and generous, some folks have taken me aside and said, “There’s something about him that rubs me the wrong way.”

That “something” is the way he uses his palms. In the Hitler example, you saw the raw emotional power of a simple palm position, but again, that’s not realistic. Here’s how your palms can make somebody dislike you (like my friend) in a real conversation.

Stand in front of a mirror so you can see the full effect. Let’s say you met a guy who’s so good looking he makes your teeth ache. Pretend you’re telling him a funny story about the time you asked a co-worker to move a pile of folders from one side of the room to the other. With your palm facing down, point your hand to the imaginary pile, then to where you want it to go. Now, try it again, this time by pointing with your index finger.

Either of those palm positions will make Toothache think you’re a prick. And he won’t even be able to tell you why. But I can. Research shows both of those hand positions communicate a contemptuous, overbearing personality. Especially, the finger pointing. It’s subconsciously perceived as a symbolic club that you beat the listener with, a kind of over-the-arm blow primates use to attack.

In fact, the research is so clear and so consistent it rises to the level of law: Do not EVER talk to anyone by pointing your finger or turning your palm down. If you’re a habitual finger pointer, stop. Yes, some guys are turned on by macho, command-and-control authority figures, but come on. When was the last time anybody said to themselves, “Tonight I want to meet an arrogant prick who thinks I’m an idiot.”

Author, columnist and TV personality Mike Alvear writes a sex advice column syndicated to the gay press. Meet and attract better looking men with his new gay body language eBook. His instantly downloadable eBook on gay body language, ATTRACT HOTTER GUYS, is available at http://www.mikealvear.com/ebook.

First off, cast the net wide. Just about all gay online dating services will offer you a limited membership; take it. This will give you the chance to try many different services and choose the one or two that fit the best.

Next thing, be sure to locate your local gay dating base within the online dating site. In other words, check your locality for available members. This will make it easier to eliminate potential gay online dating services you’re only using as a trial-member. Obviously, the services that should make the cut are the ones that have the most members available to you.

Also, be sure to use all available functions of the gay online dating services that you’re trying out. Don’t just go in, contact a couple people, and never go back. Try all the gadgets out. There are many different functions that one site may offer that another doesn’t necessarily have. By doing this, you will also come closer to finalizing the exact gay online community that fit you the best.

Finally, to piggy-back off the previous tip, look for sites that can offer you the most. By this, I mean gay online dating services that have the possibility of messaging, chat rooms, private blogging, status feeds, webcam chat, and much more. You would be surprised at how bigger online gay dating services can offer much more in terms of functionality through more complex technology.

While we have covered many important points in this article, there many to still consider; for example, how to create an effective profile, what is proper etiquette, and how to choose a potential good partner.

To learn more about these points and much more, be sure to click the following link for more tips on Gay Online Dating Services.

Here are some points and tips on the things that you should not include in your résumé:

Things you hated about your previous job
Take note that your résumé should never be a document that contains the things or issues that made you leave your previous job. Remember that what you say about your old job is a reflection of how you are as an employee. Saying bad things about your old company would only paint you a bad picture. So instead of ranting, start on a right note by mentioning the positive things and experiences that you have acquired from your old work.

Things that you hated about your last boss or co-worker
What you mention about your old boss or manager will also make an impact on your résumé. Even if your previous boss or co-worker acted like a jerk, refrain form including this in your résumé. Instead, show your positive say by saying good things that you have learned from your previous employer.

Irrelevant work experiences
Always remember that your résumé should contain all the vital information that could help you land your dream job. So make sure that you tailor fit your résumé to adapt to the requirements that work is calling for. Avoid including qualifications that are unrelated with the position that you are applying for.

All your work experience
Although your résumé should be complete, you do not have to write down every single job that you have had since you were a teenager. This means you should avoid typing down jobs like baby-sitting, grocery checker, etc. So always take note of the word: RELEVANT.

Sexual Preference
Whether you are straight or gay, your sexual preference does not have any bearing with your work performance.

Religion
Religion is a very serious issue, and more often than not, people are uncomfortable discussing this subject. So save your employer the hassle and leave out religion in your résumé. Instead, focus on relevant things such as your work experience, skills, and other qualifications.

Social Security Number
Your social security number is something that is very personal. So make sure that you do not disclose this information unless you have already been hired.

Health Issues
Always remember that employers do not have any legal right to know an applicant’s health status.

Criminal Record
Although it is a good thing to be honest, including your criminal record in your résumé would not help you get the job. Instead of focusing on your past, why not include your high hopes for your career.

Information about your personal life
Your personal life should not be a part of something as corporate as a résumé. So avoid mentioning information such being divorced or annulled.

This post is by Donald Varner of http://freejobsearch.org/

Should I go to a GUM clinic?

If you’re concerned that you may have any form of sexually transmitted infection, you should visit a GUM clinic. If you notice any symptoms such as abdominal pains, unusual discharges or burning sensations when urinating you should visit a clinic as soon as possible.

Also, if you have regular unprotected sex with multiple partners it is advisable to get tested frequently. Gay men are particularly at risk from HIV infection. Being proactive now could help protect your health for the future.

Should I consult my GP first?

A GUM clinic offers more specialist testing, treatment and advice than a GP or general surgery. Not only that, if you go to your GP and are then referred to a GUM clinic, then the GP will be informed of your visit. However, if you go direct to a GUM clinic you are not obliged to tell your GP that you have done so.

So, is it confidential?

GUM clinics fall under special confidentiality laws that protect your personal information. You don’t have to give your real name, and you don’t have to pass details on to your GP or insurance provider (depending on the result of any tests).

What does testing involve?

There are many different types of tests available at GUM clinics for many different types of infection. Urine tests, genital swabs and blood tests are the three most common forms. Nearly all tests involve very little discomfort.

The type of test you’ll need depends on any symptoms you have, or on the information provided to the clinician about your lifestyle and sexual relationships (it’s important to be honest – you won’t be judged on any of your lifestyle choices).

In many cases, results can be available within 24hrs, or even within the hour.

Why use a private clinic?

A good private clinic will usually offer a more flexible range of services – in a more discrete and comfortable setting. The best (particularly the larger London clinics) are able to offer better testing and treatment options than NHS alternatives. In some cases, you’ll have access to the finest private doctors available. You may also be able to find clinics that offer walk-in STI testing.

Check your clinic beforehand for information about their services and reputation, as well as to establish that they are Healthcare Commission approved and registered.

The drawback to online dating, certainly for these special interest groups, is the validity of the person on the other end of cyber space. Cyber stalking is up 55% in the last two years, and meeting someone on the outside after meeting them online in a chat room or through an online dating service can be risky business.

Here are the top five questions and online dating tips. The questions are designed so that you may be able to get a better sense of who the person is outside the monitor.

But just to be safe, be sure to meet your date in a public area and stay in a public space for the first date. Do not let them know where you live and be aware of giving leading information out while in a chat room.

• What is the biggest mistake people make when first dating? (This will give you an idea as to how the other person really feels about relationships etc.)

• What do you look for in a guy? (Be aware of canned banter. If they come off with the usual “sense of humor, nice personality,” they probably haven’t thought much about a real answer.)

• Define a truly successful relationship. (This one is my favorite, listen for blaming of others. Hint: A truly successful relationship is where both get a better sense of self, whether they stay together or not.)

• What happened with your last relationship? (Again, listen for blaming. Do they take responsibility for the breakup? If they’re willing to share equally, great, if they take all of the blame they probably have low self esteem and are needy. If they won’t take any of the blame they are control freaks and probably cruel.)

• What do you really think about online dating services? (Will let you know if they are desperate, open, or controlling.)

Well, for starters, don’t even think that just because online dating services have somewhat made the whole dating scene a “little less complicated”, it doesn’t automatically mean that they’ve been able to make things any easier. Sure, online dating services have been able to make the whole “meet and greet” process “quick and simple” but that’s where online dating ends and real life dating begins.

There are many online dating sites on the internet that are not just offering their free online dating services and some “valuable” tips on how to get things going in the “real world” may actually help you a bit but in order for you to survive the real world dating scene, you must have realistic expectations.

While you must be open minded about the whole adult online dating scene, you must not be naïve to believe in everything that you read/see on other people’s profiles. Again, while not everyone are coming up with false claims about themselves, its better be safe than sorry.

Sometimes it’s actually wiser to just meet up with the person that you’ve met thru online dating after interacting online for just awhile. While this will give you some time to actually get to know your new “friend”, this short span of time will at least give you a hint if this person that you’ve met through online dating is really someone whom you’d like to date outside the online dating arena. Try to interact on a more “personal basis” aside from exchanging e-mails or online instant messages, why not try to communicate the “old fashioned way” by calling each other up? Sometimes you can also get a better feel of a person’s personality by the way they carry themselves while they speak. There are some people who tend to have a weird laugh, even a creepy one, so can are you still willing to date someone like that? It’s best to a least get over some of the minor glitches that comes with online dating before you end up wasting your time with the wrong person.

As for finally going out on your date with someone you’ve met from these free online dating service sites, it’s best to keep things casual at first. Don’t try to rush intimacy because it might just blow back to your face. Try to get to know more of the person you’ve met through online dating just a little deeper before you decide on “taking the plunge” because you never can be too careful with strangers. Some might actually turn out to be psychos, married people or sexual predators even. It’s always best to not let your guard down even if the person you’ve met through online dating “seems nice”.

Once you’re already sitting across your date from the online world. You must remember some simple rules when trying to engage in some “witty conversation”:

Never ask overtly sexual questions nor make sexual innuendoes: men usually commit this mistake when they meet someone that they’re really physically attracted to. While there are those who to quick test the waters and are seeking to easily get lucky. Women sometimes makes the same mistake and basically for the same reasons as men but the point is, even though these people have put themselves out in the online dating scene, they are not offering free sex to just about anyone that they meet.

Never interrogate your date: while it’s good that you’re very much interested in your date and would want to get to know him or her on a deeper level, it is never safe to assume that you can ask your date just about anything that pops in your head. This can just make your date feel every uncomfortable and uneasy – how would you feel if you been made to feel like you’re under a microscope being scrutinized?

Be open minded: always remember that you’re two different people. No matter how much you have in common, you still have your own thoughts and ideas and while you or your date may not always agree on some things it’s best not to bee too biased or judgmental over other people’s opinions.

Depending on what community a Gay Christian single lives in, it can be difficult to interact with other Gay Christians. They might have to travel to far, or not know the best places to go. Gay Christian dating services give Gay Christians an instant chance to meet other singles and share their religious beliefs.

These services will give a Gay Christian single a chance to grow spiritually and socially. Many of the services have Bible study chat rooms where young Gay Christians can be taught by the more worldly Christians. These study periods may not be available for some Gay Christians offline so they will be an invaluable source of knowledge and aid a Gay Christian in growing internally.

Choosing the right Gay Christian dating service is an important factor for their enjoyment. This will also give them a better chance of building a meaningful relationship. Finding out how many Gay Christians there are living within a designated distance is going to be the first test. With Gay Christian dating services some supplying a free trial period in various forms, at least finding this out may cost nothing.

Once the Gay Christian online dating service has been chosen the adventure begins. With the free service still being used usually a single can only respond to another singles messages. You may get the chance to send some sort of teaser to show you are interested, but generally to initiate full contact a single must pay for a membership. A months online dating never costs more than a few nighst out, so not that many singles should be put off by the price.

Thousands of Gay Christian singles worldwide are enjoying the advantages that Gay Christian online dating gives them. Many of them have found their perfect partners that they never would have met offline, which makes it all the more a worthwhile experience.

The top gay dating tips:

1. Location, location, location! Choosing a meeting place is extremely important. Agree to meet at a place that is neutral, not too far from your dwellings and be familiar with the area. You would want to also choose a place that is not too noisy or rowdy, more like a quiet bar where you can both communicate and be heard effectively.

2. Concentrate my dear! Dating can always be extremely tense and nerve racking, especially if you are the quiet or shy type. One point to remember is to listen carefully to what your date has to say, this will enable you to relate and connect more easily.

3. A little bit of give and take: Share the conversation, ask as many questions as you like, feel free to talk about yourself, but also be courteous and listen to what the other person has to say.

4. What was in the past is better left in the past: Do not dwell in the past and absolutely refrain from mentioning your past relationships and negative experiences. Remember, every first date is a new beginning and should be treated like one. So, feel confident and be optimistic, stick to the present and the future. Show your date that his time is now and that you have no left over baggage.

5. Radiate: Show your inner glow and be positive. There is nothing like a positive and optimistic person. It shows a good level of confidence, which is definitely attractive in many people’s eyes. Bury your negative thoughts and think positive.

6. To hump or not to hump? It has been proven time and time again that one night stands or “hi how are you, let’s have sex” encounters do not last the test of time or more than 24 hours for that matter. If that is what you are seeking, fine, but just play it SAFE, otherwise you may want to concentrate further on the conversation and leave sex for another time. This will show that you are genuinely interested in your date and wish to take matters further.

7. Easy come, easy go: There is no need to rush the situation. Take your time, give yourself and the other person time to breath and discover how you truly feel about each other. It is not advisable to become too serious too quickly at an early stage in the dating process. This might easily scare off the other person who may not feel ready for a relationship or commitment.

8. Honesty shall set you free: There is no point in beating around the bush. Be true to yourself and your feelings towards this person. If you feel you are not getting the attention you deserve, let yourself be heard. If your interest is not reciprocated, direct your attention on somebody that will appreciated it. Like wise, if you grow dissatisfied or lose interest in the person, let it be known.

9. R.E.S.P.E.C.T: One of the most important gay dating tips is to treat the other person with the same level of respect as you feel you deserve. There is no point in wasting time and playing games, return their phone calls and speak to them. If you are not interested, have the decency of letting the person know rather than taking them on a roller coaster ride of uncertainty.

Meeting someone new is never easy, let alone dating them. We hope these gay dating tips have given you a valuable insight into etiquettes involved with dating. We wish you the very best of luck and hope that you keep these gay dating tips in mind.